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Wednesday, September 19, 2018

idk what to title this

I really don't know. I'm just here to talk about whatever. 

(Pfft, what else is new?) 


Personal perks of having to spend the day fasting:

• It takes a pretty long time for me to get really hungry 
• I don't have to remind myself to get food and drink water (cus humans have to do that to survive lol) 

The cons: 

• Uh, everything else..? 

I got a headache. Still got a headache. I drank some water though. And took an Advil. 

(omg no one cares, cpup) 

So, this was the first year I had to go to classes. Didn't go to services. 

Darn. :( 

Classes are tiring. Especially not being able to eat or drink anything all day. And having a lecture about nutrition/nutrients in my last class today. 

Ah, life... 

I just stopped talking to my family at home on the phone. They told me Thelma turned her head when she heard my voice. She was apparently sleeping next to the house phone. :') 

It's not even 10 yet I'm very tired right now.


I have NYC class trips every week. Got another one tomorrow. 

Oh! I have pictures. 

I really should start spamming you with only picture posts. Seriously. 

I hope I don't accidentally make myself be a complete idiot again. I felt like the dumbest one in the group. 

Yeah ahh. Definitely a bad feeling. 


Random story/skit characters thought: 

Ryen is four to five years older than Fierdan. Depends on the month. 

I still haven't figured out Ryen's birthday, but I know it's before December which is Fierdan's birthday month. 

Thinking of their childhood still pains me emotionally. Geez, it hurts. 


I'm getting busy with coursework. 

Not a surprise. 

I'll still post though. 

I'm still here. 

But that's it for this post. 

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

mondays are long and tiring

Yep. True that. Mondays are long and tiring. 

The work is piling on. Ahh..!

My first class got canceled though. 

But whatever, I still got that stress, baby! (aaahhhh)

About those worms I mentioned last week, well, they're stressing me out. :^( 

Oh hahaha haha ha! College sure is FUn!!!1!!?1!1!?! 


I really want to make that skit. But I'm busy. Ugh, why must life be this way? Ouch. </3 

Bye, bye. 

Monday, September 17, 2018

ummm fierdan lol

Hi, here's a new post. 

Eww, it's Monday. Which means it's gonna be a long day. Yip pee. :| 

Uh hhhhh ok ????

Well then. I'm here to make a list of things that cheer me up from wanting to do the Die. 

1. Listen to music 
2. Watch shows
• by "shows" I mean starting new Netflix series and watching those recent new anime episodes 
3. Reread my old-ish skit posts
4. Fierdan. 

Ah yes. Him. I've been thinking about him. 

Yeah uh. Ok. 


I recently have come to realized how young I made him. Like, what?? I'm. 

So, Fierdan is 19. Like, that's the age I decided to give him. Like, that's how old he supposedly is in his current form. 

*pop up appears with an evolution chart of fierdan forms* 

..... anyway! 

Lmao. That's so young actually. Come to think of it, that's like young. He's like a boy. Wtf. 

Tf?! Watch me continue writing legit story stuff when I'm 19. And I thought 19 was old. Omg pls save my soul. 

I can't relate to my twink and puke characters because I'm older than them now somehow. I'm no longer 17. I'm 18. Am I more like Fierdan now?! Help-

Fierdan, a character whose age should either be in his mid-20s or in his 100s. But no. Story one present time Fierdan is 19. 

"what's up, i'm fierdan, i'm 19, and i never learned how to cope." 

I haven't been thinking of any of my other characters. I left them. Heck. 

I hope they're okay. What are they doing? I didn't write a skit since July. 

Wait. Are Twinkle, Duke, Finny, Sparkle, and Brock in college now in the skit universe? Last year they were high school seniors. Are they in college? Where are they? Are they still together? Are they separated? What's the truth? Heck! 

I lowkey want to make a skit where Ryen criticizes Fierdan for not doing anything with his life. Like, there's the other characters I just listed at college(s). The younger ones are struggling through high school. Ryen graduated school/college and has a job but I never talked about that before lol. And then there's Fierdan. And he's just. In pjs all day, roams around the house, is a mess, etc. 

Oh right, that skit idea. So Ryen forces lazy boy Fierdan to apply to jobs and colleges. And yeah. Sure. Ok. Yeah. 

I started comforting myself by thinking of soft Fierdan moments. Like.. yes. 

• the Awkward Fierdan 
• the Breaking Down Your Gender Roles Fierdan
• the Adrogynous Look(s) Fierdan 
• the Little Kid So Pure So Sweet Fierdan 
• the Talking Casually To Night Crow Fierdan
• the Blushing Fierdan 
• the Sipping Tea/Coffee/Hot Chocolate Fierdan 
• the Being Nerdy Fierdan 
• the Being A Goof Fierdan 
• the Soft Casual Voice Fierdan
• the Getting Out Of Those Filthy Black Clothes Fierdan 
• the Bi Mess Fierdan (because he's, he's bi like I said since forever apparently like uhh I can't see him as being straight like a straight thing ok-)

Lmao oops, I almost started to forget he's like an edgy killer character. I just have so many more soft/good Fierdan moments as opposed to basically what's in canon (he's a total bitch in what I have out in canon so far, I hate him). Asdfghjkl-

I don't know why I haven't been thinking of Duke at all recently. What the heck is going on with me? Ahh! 

Fierdan, wow, I love him. This hecking boy. What a guy. Hhhhh. 

Ok lol bye. 

Saturday, September 15, 2018

Fierdan in that skit (7/25)

So, I decided to doodle Fierdan in that skit where he's hecked up. 

At first, I accidentally drew him like a little kid but then I redrew his eyes. 

Left: Fierdan holding a cup of black coffee 
Top Right: Fierdan throwing up after drinking salty af black coffee.. in the trash 
Bottom Right: Fierdan pouring way too much salt into a single cup of black coffee (but where are his hands?)

Uh yeah. 

... ok I give up. 

Friday, September 14, 2018

honestly tho

Sorry, it's because I'm indecisive. Ha, ha. 

I've been thinking. My mood or whatever changes pretty dramatically from post to post. 

My mind can't decide whether life is good or whether I should go kill myself. It depends on the day. 

And sometimes it's both. (Just kidding, every day is both. It's great. Really great.) 

Anyway yes hi, I'm an idiot in literally every way. So.. that's something. I guess. 

Ugh, I feel manipulative whenever I make unhappy posts. But. I really can't stand this. I can't stand being me. I hate just about everything about me. 

Yeah, it's very great. 

Life sucks and I hate myself more than ever. Bye. 

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

cats and self care

I actually wasn't nearly as busy yesterday than on Monday. I spent the whole morning (well, ever since I woke up lol) working on my assignment due that afternoon. But the class wasn't that bad. I like that class (so far lol). Yeah. 

I go into the city tomorrow. First class trip. Exciting! :D 

It's gonna be a long day... ^-^" 


After my last class today, I saw these two cats standing nearby. Then they ran toward the bushes on the nearest plot of non-pavement, and they hid under those. 

I took a picture on Snapchat, but there's only one cat in the picture. There were two cats there though. The other one was hiding better, pfft. 

I got so excited when I saw them. Omg I love cats so much! 

Ahh, it's a kitty cat! (i love u) 

Then as I was in the student center planning on going right back to my dorm to take a nap (I'm still so tired, ugh why the heck) there were these tables with a theme of self care and.. yeah, stuff like that. 

I got these things. I edited the pic so the college name doesn't show. Ok yeah lol. 


I think the little bag full of items with the message is so sweet and cute. 

Aww~ ;w; 

The bag there has those items in it. Ahh, just look at it! It's so nice! 

There was another table there with people handing out things about the student health and counseling center, and some things about suicide prevention and the like. 

So yeah. 


Is this enough proof that I'm really in college now? It says "college students" on it. 

(lol me *cough cough*) 

Monday, September 10, 2018

oh worms

So.. Monday, huh. Might as well had killed me. 

I had my first lab. Doing an experiment on earthworms. 

Them worms sure do wiggle a lot. 

They be like, "oh worm!" 

Right after all my classes today, I worked on my assignments (like that thing called homework). I worked for 5-6 hours since then, only stopping for a few minutes in between. 

I am tired. Today was tiring. Mondays are probably going to seem like the longest weekday for me from now on. 

And I'm still not done with an assignment I have due tomorrow. I'm way too tired to deal with it all right now. Besides, I don't have anything to do until the afternoon anyways. 

At least one of my classes today (not the lab, lmao) wasn't as stressful as I thought it would be today. Thank goodness. 

Sitting at a desk for a few hours straight hurts. Desk chairs aren't comfortable at all. 

Ok yeah bye.